Friday, June 25, 2010

Suffocated by My Thoughts

This was written on June 25th 2010

It won't leave me alone
This thought of uncertainty
I don't know about you there
Sitting all quaintly
Content in your swelling contempt
I know I'm not
Content that is
I have plenty of contempt

But I do wonder about things
Things that wrap themselves around my brain
Sending messages to my chest
It slows the beating of my heart
Pulls the oxygen from my lungs
Berating me constantly these thoughts
As if they don't want me to survive and find out
Find out the answer to all my questions
Though with every answer
Every single bit of knowledge
Comes a thousand more questions

Getting to know myself is a burden
It's time consuming
After all of these years
Nineteen to be exact
I still don't know everything
My favorite color changes with my mood
But even that is not certain
I lie through my teeth about food
But that's when I'm eating

My mind continues this rampage
Never settling for long
It wraps itself around
My throat
I can feel the constrictions
The lack of air passing to my lungs
This is how it steals it
Thoughts flooding my mind so quickly that
I just forget to breathe

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